Last night Lauren, Nick, Patrick, and I took in the Twins/Yankees game, which featured a dramatic 3-run homer in the eighth by Delmon Young off Mariano Rivera, the most dominant relief pitcher of all-time.  That tied the game at 6-6, but the Twins could never manage so much as another rally and the Yankees won in 12 innings, 9-6.  We were at the Metrodome for 4 1/2 hours and didn’t get home till midnight.

I did some laundry this week and apparently I don’t know how to do it right.  First of all, I used some powder detergent, not the liquid kind, and the clothes came out of the washer with clumps of white powder all over them.  I brushed off what I could, then put them in the dryer, where a shirt got caught on a hook on the dryer door, spinning into an impossibly tight spiral, with the other clothes attaching themselves and getting knotted up into a big ball.  I had to dry them a second time, and today when I left the house, they actually smelled worse than before I washed them.  I’m practically getting a headache from the smell.

Last week when we had that big two-day training, I took some notes.  Notes of annoying metaphors and analogies that were overused, that is.  Here are the top seven.

1) “You’re pushing rope,” or “You’re pushing wet rope,” which I guess means you’re working but not getting anywhere?  This was stated at least ten times.
2) References to “low-hanging fruit.”  “We need to pick the low-hanging fruit first.”  No, they weren’t literally going to pick fruit, though that did sound tempting.  They hoped to do the easiest part first, then work to get the rest.
3) “It’s like the red-headed step-child that no one pays attention to.”  One executive also tried to use that saying but totally butchered it, saying something like “it’s the red-headed step-child that no one can ignore.”  Apparently this means that something is there, and though it is importantn, we aren’t acknowledging it.
4) “You’re putting the cart ahead of the horse.”  This translates to us not doing something in the right order.
5) “We’re putting all our eggs in one basket here.”  Well, that one’s obvious.
6) “It’s like building a thoroughbread racehorse by committee and it ends up as a camel.”  The favorite saying of one director, who says when every last person tries to contribute their thoughts to a project, it never turns out well.
7) “We’re trying to find the golden egg.”  I guess the golden egg is something good. Either that or it really is an egg, in which case I better get off my ass and start searching.

Plans for the rest of the week are up in the air, but Saturday I am on call for DJing, and Chris Ahrendt is coming to town for a Twins game, so we’ll be sure to meet up and reminisce.  Also, keep August 29 marked on your calendars, as we’ll be hosting a little backyard bonfire in honor of my (and Roscoe’s) birthday!